Admittedly, I originally picked this one out in order to see more films with Elsa Pataky
after seeing her in Give 'em Hell Malone ‹insert wolf howl here›, and the movie turned out to
be a fairly interesting flick. But is this really based on a true story ?! Weird!
This film has a really crazy plot line that has an odd disconnected feel to it (mostly
due to the nature of the story telling involved) but I suppose "reality" can be that way sometimes. Set in
a time where a "modern" police force is trying to solve a mystery amongst the superstitious populace, there
is a palpable frustration as the characters are really struggling with what the evidence is telling them. I
appreciated that tension, which is generally relegated to lip service in most movies (or just abandoned
entirely early on like in Tim Burton's fantastic Sleepy Hollow). I think the movie would have
been better overall if the focus has shifted slighly more in that direction rather than the 'horror' element
of the werewolf attacks, but I suppose that shouldn't have surprised me since this is classified as a
horror movie.
All things considered, this is an interesting twist to the traditional werewolf story, and
is made extra creepy for the 'reality' element (however changed for entertainment purposes) mixed into
it. I'm not quite sure what to make of the 'legend' aspect of this film, but I do appreciate movies that
are based on old (old?) legends. I'll go ahead and recommend this one simply because of the creepy
atmosphere that is achieved... and seeing Pataky trying to hunt down the big baddie in the film is also
kind of fun too.
Movie to See #2: Operation: Endgame
I'm kind of on the fence for this one because it's so ridiculous. It is intentionally
claustrophobic, mostly taking place in an underground bunker, but there is just no way this could have
occurred in the physical space that it did. I guess we can write it off as a budget issue, and I'm sure
anyone could bring up the Die Hard (or worse, the Passenger 57 and Executive Decision)
scenarios, but who says I believed that one either? Yes, it's a stupid comedy, but if you stick three
people in a phone booth, you're going to know if someone farts - it's not going to go unnoticed. Same
kind of stupidity going on here... except somehow we don't know that gas is being passed. Kind of insulting...
and stinky.
That aside, it did have some pretty great lines: "You can put on make-up, but you can't
hide crazy." Totally describes several of my own former relationships... Rob Courdrey is essentially
himself, which is good, because he's over-the-top funny. Too bad he's a terrible actor. Odette Yowza...
er, Yustman is both scary and sexy in this film, and a potential 'it girl' if she can get out of horror
pics (The Unborn) and lame films like this one to make it into a bigger movie.
It's a very tongue-in-cheek spy movie, so if you can't stand those, you won't like this one.
But, if you find the humor in spoof films like Airplane (although this one isn't nearly as good), then
you might get a good chuckle or two out of this one too. I'll recommend it, but just barely...
Movie to See #3: The Lost Tribe
I am only bumping this movie out of the two star range because of its production value,
which was actually a lot better than most horror movies you'll see. But that having been said, this is
really a two star movie due almost entirely to its complete lack of originality. This movie is essentially
Predator, no joke. While the dialogue is different, and the apparent premise is not the same,
the action of the movie is otherwise a near shot-to-shot remake of the much better classic horror film
(even down to mud bath combat!). Instead of aliens you get villains that are Lord of the Rings
Urak' Hai costumes with monkey hair glued on. And that's pretty much where the differences end.
One funny note in this film is that the deadly monkey people have amusing super-human
abilities that really go along quite well with the outlandish stupidity of the heroes. The story, which
is driven by human stupdity, is totally unbelievable, and these morons do absolutely everything they
shouldn't do along the way. Surprisingly, nay - shockingly - that stupidity actually makes this movie
kind of fun to watch. I can't explain it, but it does. Of course, that also means the scare factor
in this movie is near zero... which isn't what you typically want to see in a horror film.
I'm going to have to go ahead and recommend this film, but it's really most enjoyable
for fans of Predator that don't mind flattering imitation, and for people that want to see a horror
movie that lacks any real scares.
Movie to Skip #1: Beneath the Dark
This is supposedly a redemption story, of sorts... Unfortunately it has a horribly
predictable twist at the end. It is just so obvious what is going on that the director/writer's choice
to twist the movie's time line only created unnecessary confusion and made the side reel story feel too
disconnected. It takes so long for the side reel to tie into the main story that I had pretty much given
up on it making any real sense long before the point was made. Further, because it was such a predictable
ending, I kept getting more and more impatient for the connection between the stories to be made so that
the morons in the audience could have their "aha" moment, and we could plod along to the end of the movie.
Yeah, it's never a good sign when all you want is for the story to wrap up so you can get to the end...
I'm not a huge fan of thrillers relying on keeping the audience confused in order to
build tension. It can work (e.g. Memento), but if you're going to go there, then you can't
telegraph the end of the movie within the first couple of minutes in the film. It just becomes distracting
and kind of unpleasant to sit through. Further, if you want to cause confusion, then there has to
be some kind of palpable tension created by the confusing elements... not just a boring unconnected side
reel story that builds SO slowly to the tension filled "act" that ties the two stories together that the
side reel feels pointless up until the "aha" moment.
While I could see some promise (kind of) in the story, it was very poorly executed. The
pace was terrible, and the writing was even worse. This could have been an interesting movie, but
it truly failed to deliver. Skip this one and see Memento instead.
Movie to Skip #2: Canadian Bacon
This is one of those sad little comedies that really isn't very funny. I realize that
there is an argument that humor is an intellectual activity, and that a lot of things we don't find
funny is more about our own lack of familiarity with the subject matter than it is with the quality of
the joke. But in this case, I think it's more an issue of poor jokes. There are a LOT of late '80s names
in this film, but relatively few laughs under the circumstances. Yes, it has an intentionally stupid plot,
but that doesn't always doom a film. Die Hard had a stupid plot, but it was good fun to watch. This
one had a dumb plot, but it just doesn't sell well. The jokes are too canned, and the delivery kind of
poor given the obvious talent that graced the screen.
I just can't bring myself to like this one. It's got its funny moments, and yeah, it's fun
to see the role reversals (Canadians playing Americans and vice versa), but ultimately it's just lame.
Maybe it just hasn't aged well, I don't know. But I just didn't buy into it.
Movie to Skip #3: The Oxford Murders
One thing really, really bothers me about this movie: why does this young genius keep
getting distracted by the cantankerous old man rather than hanging out with the busty co-ed? I mean, sure,
John Hurt is cool, but when you're a 20-something college guy, and Leonor Watling is trying to jump your
bones every time you walk into a room, there isn't a warm blooded straight man in the world that is going
to brush her off so you can go chat about patterns with a grumpy old college professor. It's just NOT
gonna happen.
But that is not the worst sin this movie makes. Overall, this movie can be distilled down
to one word: Contrived - and not in a good way. The Divinci Code was contrived and full of puzzles,
but these just don't feel like real puzzles. What is worse, the whole thing boils down to an all
too convenient solution that reeks of deus ex machina. That's not a good way for a mystery/puzzle
movie to wrap itself up. Frankly, it is a serious insulting disservice to the audience that agreed to
try and solve the mystery with you. For that reason, despite the fantastic actors in this film, I can't
recommend it... unless you enjoy being tricked and treated like a moron by the writer/director.
